He will find a child staring at him, wide-eyed and full of wonder. ...Actually, uh, were their eyes even open? They looked kind of sleepy but there was no mistaking the raw, unbridled excitement of finding A GIANT DOG HOLY GUACAMOLE

They gasp and smile, then hold out a hand -- no pets yet, though. Don't pet dogs if they want no petting, especially if they're six feet tall. That's a game over, right there.

"Hi," They say and carefully shuffle forward.