(no subject)

[astandupguy]

[No matter who you are or where you are, if you're walking around...just about anywhere on campus, you're likely to find a skeleton. However, what he'll be doing when you find him depends solely on the time of day.

Maybe you'll find him sleeping somewhere. Anywhere. Even places that don't make logical sense. As long as his body can fit, bam. Done deal.

Perhaps he's standing on a milk crate, holding onto a lint roller and cracking some absolutely terrible jokes to anyone who walks by.

Or he could have a booth set up. Looks kinda like the kind you'd see a sentry having. However, instead of guarding something...he's selling hot dogs? Or hot cats, if that's more your style.]

Comments

[astandupguy]

[Welp. He can't judge. It's folks like this who keep him in business.

Still...]

* whoa. hang on there a second, pally. we got a policy here. if you can't hold onto that many at once, i'm gonna have to stack 'em on your head.

[punchtheflute]

Woah! What a weird policy! But, OK, rules are rules and I can hold a lot of hotdogs at once.

[He just kind of sat down off to the side to make Sans' job easier.]

My name is Sonny Moe! It's nice to meet you! It's hard to get a good hot-dog around here sometimes so you're a very welcome member of the community!

[astandupguy]

* yeah, i thought the same thing. but my boss has got a real sense of humor.

[Admittedly making 20 hot dogs is a bit much, even for him, so it'll take Sans a little bit. In the meantime...]

* i'm sans. sans the skeleton.

* and the feelings likewise.

[Before long, all those hot dogs are sitting casually on paper plates. For a moment, Sans falls quiet, until he realizes something.]

* so i'm gonna have to be frank with you, buddy. not really sure what the currency is here. or what the exchange rate is. like i said, my boss is a real joker. so why don't you tell me what you'd be willing to pay for these hot dogs and we'll go from there.

[punchtheflute]

Oh! Well, we usually pay for things with dollars! Some people pay with gold coins, like my Boss. Others pay with rupees which are like jewels. Some pay with Pokéyen! I only have dollars, right now. Mostly? Hotdogs cost an average of two dollars each. You'll find some as cheap as a dollar and some as expensive as three. Never pay more than three dollars for a hotdog unless it has premium toppings, Sans.

[Serious Life Advice Right Here.]

Premium. Like bacon and grilled bell pepper and the brown kind of mustard.

I'll pay you fifty dollars for all these hotdogs. That's two dollars and fifty cents each. I'll also give you a ten dollar tip because I asked you to make so many. Does that sound fair?

[This is high finance stuff here and Sonny never shirks his responsibilities as a good customer.]

[astandupguy]

[...wow. Honest doesn't really seem strong enough a word for this guy, huh? Kinda reminds him of his bro. Which makes him feel at least a little bad for wanting to pull a (harmless) joke on the guy. But there's nothing wrong with a little bit of good-natured ribbing. And at least the hot dogs are real. How he got them cooked and still piping hot without anything to do so in view is...something.]

* so that's 60 dollars in total.

* i dunno, pal, that seems like a little steep of a price to charge for hot dogs. even if these are pretty great.

* how about i give you a break? we've got a sale going on right now. buy one hot dog, get one for 0.0000000000000001% off.

[punchtheflute]

Oh!

[...well. There was a... deal?]

I'm going to be honest with you? Math was never my best subject? How much off total would that be? Or would you rather just deduct it yourself and keep the change as part of your tip? I'll still give you sixty dollars.

[It probably works out to be less than a penny anyway. That is a LOT of zeroes!]

1/2

[astandupguy]

* naw, it's alright. just a little joke. if sixty dollars is what you're comfortable with, that's fine with me.

* besides. i'm gonna be honest with you, kid. math's never been the subject for me, either.

2/2

[astandupguy]

* i just don't have the brain for it.

Re: 2/2

[punchtheflute]

[....Snicker. Small chuckle. Oh man but should he even be laughing because what if that wasn't intentional and he's being an insensitive jerk by finding it funny.]

You're the guy with all the hotdogs, so, you call the shots! Those are the rules, I think!

[astandupguy]

[No, it's totally supposed to be funny. Even Sans is chuckling a little himself.]

* to be fair, they do say the customer is always right.

* unless they're wrong. but 60 sounds good to me. you want any condiments with them?