And Thus, a Dog

[showcase_showdog]

Standing outside the door to the cafeteria is a 5-foot-3-inch-tall puppy man wearing a red blazer, yellow necktie, and blue pants.

He'll assure you that he's an adult and not a puppy, but there's no making a shih-tzu with a puppy cut look terribly old.

He appears to be guarding the entrance to the cafeteria. If you want to get in for your afternoon snack or your noon-time meal, you're going to have to get past him.

He's quite diligent. There is no sneaking past him. He always gets his man, or woman, or pelican, or squirrel. Or tapir.

The point is, you're going to have to talk to this adorable dog man if you want to eat.

Comments

[showcase_showdog]

The giantdogman blinks a few times. "Oh my goodness," he says, blushing just slightly beneath his fur. "What a very nice thing to say! It's so nice to meet you! My name is Digby. I'm not very giant, though. I'm just Digby height. You're a bit taller than I am. What's your name?"

[flamejock]

"My name is Jock! I'm a dog, too!" he said excitedly. "Let's be friends!"

[showcase_showdog]

"Whaaaat?" Digby asked in amazement. "But you're not a dog, you're a human, like the mayor! And you're a jock? Does that mean you like to lift weights and call people bro?"

[flamejock]

"I like to lift weights and call people bro, but my name is Jock," explained Jock. "And I'm a dog! Here, look!"

And here, dear reader, Jock scrunched his face up and there was a poof of smoke.

[flamedog]

And then suddenly there was a giant tiger dog instead of a man with totally awesome hair.

The giant dog leaned down and licked Digby on the cheek.

[showcase_showdog]

Digby looks on in amazement at what he's just witnessed. This is at least the second or third most amazing thing he's seen this week.

"Oh wow! You're a human who's also a dog! And you gave me a kiss! But you're naked now... like KK Slider... are you a musician? Do you play music? I like music."

[flamedog]

[I like music but I don't know how to play it! I just like to listen to it! I like it when my mom sings to me! It's the nicest and best music in the world.]

It really was the nicest and best music in the world. For Jock, anyway.

[showcase_showdog]

Digby stared at the giant dog.

"I... I'm sorry?" he said, tilting his head to the side. "What funny noises are you making? Are you alright? Do you feel okay? Do you need help?"

[flamedog]

[Whaaaaaat? Why can't you understand me. The other dogs understand me. You're a dog! You should be able to understand me when I speak in dog!]

Jock looks concerned and confused and a number of other con- things.

[showcase_showdog]

"Oh my goodness, what is this," said Digby in confusion. "I don't understand you when you're a dog, but I'm a shih-tzu. This doesn't make any sense at all. Are you speaking a foreign language? Am I feeling okay? Is there a doctor or nurse I need to go to? Do I need to have my ears checked?" Digby is swaying from side to side nervously. This is a situation he wasn't prepared to handle. He grabbed at one of his silky ears and tugged it slightly.

"I'm so very confused, giant dog."

[flamejock]

Giant dog licks Digby on the face again and then poofs into being just a hairy muscular guy.

"Why can't you understand me when I'm a pokemon? Other dogs can understand me." Jock looks really confused. "Are you sure you're actually a dog?"

Jock leans over to smell Digby. "You smell like a dog."

[showcase_showdog]

"That's because I am a dog," said Digby. "I'm... I'm very confused about how you turn into that giant orange dog and then into a muscular man. Can you explain it all to me? I want to understand it and understand what a pokemon is."

[flamejock]

"Do you like my muscles?" Jock asked, holding his bicep up and flexing in front of Digby's face. "You can touch. Do you want to touch? You can touch my muscles."

[showcase_showdog]

"Oh," said Digby, as he reached up and touched Jock's muscles with his paw. "You are very much a Jock," he said simply. "Your muscles are very nice. But," he said, dropping his arm and no longer touching Jock's muscles, "If you could explain to me just how you turned into a dog and then into a human again?"